Subject: Articles of Faith of Mormon Culture

My Dad sent me this in an email, and I thought it was he-larious. Enjoy.

1. We believe in SUVs and minivans, as the form of transportation, and in knee length shorts, which are always nice, and in the multilevel marketing.

2. We believe that church ball players should be punished for their own fouls, and not for unsportsmanlike aggression.

3. We believe that through bread crumbs, cheese, creamy soups, and rice all casseroles can be saved through obedience to ward cookbooks and creativity in the mixing bowl.

4. We believe that the first layers and ingredients of the Dip are: first, beans; second, cheese; third, chopped
tomatoes; fourth, the gift of sour cream; fifth, olives; sixth, salsa; seventh, guacamole, that is, if you have it.

5. We believe that a Mormon should have a distinguished or a cute name, that it is appropriate to name a child after a church leader or a historical figure including an ancestor, that alternative spellings and French prefixes only add to a name, and that when referring to the names of General Authorities, middle initials should be a part thereof.

6. We believe in the same wall decor that exists in many Mormon homes, namely, framed family proclamations, vinyl lettering, inspirational word signs, family photos, pictures of temples and Jesus, and so forth.

7. We believe in the gift of the re-gift, church books, crafts, family photos, baked goods, emergency supply kits, and so forth.

8. We believe in sparkling grape juice so long as it is nonalcoholic; we also believe in bringing root beer and sprite to ward parties.

9. We believe in all that we have scrapbooked, all that we will now scrapbook, and we believe that we will yet scrapbook many great and important things pertaining to our family, friends, pets, and vacations.

10. We believe in the literal mixing of ketchup and mayo and in the generous application of ranch dressing; that CBAs (church-based acronyms) will be used to describe YM/YW, PEC, the Y, NCMO, and CTR; that Mitt Romney will get Mormons to vote for him any time he runs; and, that the Mormons will enjoy reading Twilight and The Work and the Glory.

11. We claim the privilege of trying to identify common acquaintances with any visitor at church, and allow all other people at church the same privilege, and let them name drop the names of Famous and general authorities how, where, or what they may.

12. We believe in being subject to scoutmasters, pampered chef hostesses, and the writers of the U.S. News and World Report Rankings for professional schools, and in obeying, honoring, and sustaining Glenn Beck.

13. We believe in being above average, good at crafts, optimistic, and being fifteen minutes late everywhere we go. Indeed, we may say that we follow BYU football. We believe rumors about famous people joining the church, we hope to meet the three Nephites, we have endured many pyramid schemes, and hope to be able to endure all pyramid schemes. If there is anything cheap, free, sold in bulk, or given away when somebody is moving, we seek after these things.

Family

We had family photos taken last week by our friend/ family member Alan Lawrence. I love them so much! Thank you Alan!

Mother of FIVE.

So, friends, I'm 9 weeks pregnant. How 'bout that?!

Sad times.

Here's Finn with a gigantic sock on his leg. The gigantic sock is covering up the gigantic splint which he will be wearing until his newly broken leg is casted tomorrow.

My poor baby! I can't believe this happened, but I guess it was only a matter of time before some bone was broken in a house full of boys.

Finn loves to climb on everything. The higher the better. On Friday, he climbed, as he often does, up onto the dining room table to grab the markers Owen was using. I was watching from the kitchen and saw him try to get down onto a chair to get off the table, but misjudged where he was, and found no chair beneath him to stand on. So he slid off the table, scraping his chin as he fell. He cried and cried and cried, and I felt so bad, thinking that sure must have hurt his little chinny. He went down for a nap right after this, so it wasn't until later in the day that I realized he was really favoring his right leg. He wouldn't put any weight on it at all, and cried when I lifted it up to change his diaper, etc.

I had a hunch it was broken, but we waited and watched for awhile, debating whether or not we wanted to pay big bucks for x-rays if it was nothing but a bruise or something... It's so hard to know! But by Sunday, I knew something was wrong, and in fact told Jason I thought his right fibula was broken. I know people thought I was crazy when I told them my suspicions while we were at church. Finn was crawling all over the place just fine! But I finally convinced Jason to take him into the Instacare that afternoon. He called me soon after with the report: Broken fibula, and possibly fractured tibia as well.

He's looking at 4-6 weeks with a cast up to his bum. Should be a lot of fun for him. (And us.) So far he is able to get around just fine, and has gone right back to his old ways of climbing up on high objects. Didn't learn his lesson, I guess. He's so mad because he can't take a bath and can't get up on his rocking motorcycle. Poor kid. I'm also sad about this interfering with his newly found walking skills. Drat.

Manly weekend.

I took the oldest boys, Bennett, Owen, and Jake up for an overnighter waaaaay up above Hardware Ranch with my family last night. Jason was home with Finn who would not have had (nor been) any fun crawling through the dirt with his big splint on. It was such a fun overnighter. We really packed the fun into the few hours we were there. I think my boys thought they were in heaven. Here's why:






Can you blame them? It was like all their wildest dreams had come true! I also had a great time. Here's why:

Thanks, Jaime and Tyler and Mom and Dad, for all the fun! And thank you, Andrew, for planting all kinds of naughty ideas in my boys' heads... You are hilarious!

Jake goes to school.

I know I already posted a picture of him going to school, but here is his actual first-day shot. I did manage to cut off the top of his mohawk in this pic, though. Dang. What a cutie!

First Day

I am pleased to announce that Owen loved his first day of Kindergarten. His words were,

"School is really fun."

YAY!!!!!

And maybe the best part was listening to him and Bennett on the way home, discussing the fine P.E. program at Adams Elementary. Soooo cute. They are totally in the same big boy "club" now with all kinds of things to talk about.

Hubby.

Is it wrong to talk about your husband's Bishop-ness on your blog? I don't know, but I'm about to do it.

Tonight Jason has been gone for hours. He's visiting a family in distress, a ward member in the hospital, and one in the Cache County jail.

Being a Bishop is a lot bigger than I thought. It takes more time, and is more draining than I realized. Jason has literally aged in the 8 months he has been Bishop (don't worry- he's still totally hot), but does all his work with a cheerful heart and so much love for each member of the 9th ward. I feel so lucky to be his wifey. Somehow he takes care of all of us at the same time, and I don't know how he does it. But I'm grateful. And I want him to know he's doing a good job. At all of it.

School Days

I can't believe it. Last week Bennett started second grade. Tomorrow Owen is starting Kindergarten. And Tuesday, Jake will start preschool at USU's Child Development Lab. This is a reminder to me that these days (hard though they are) go so fast. They are growing up before my very eyes! All of them are so excited about school this year, and of course I am a very proud mama at how brilliant and charming they all are. My big boys!

Salt Lake Outing

My youngest sister, Jaime, and I were able to spend the day in Salt Lake last week thanks to my ever-generous mother who watched our kids. We were able to go to the temple and see the 2009 International Art Competition at the Conference Center. It was such a splendid day. Oh, I don't think I mentioned that we ate out twice that day. We sure did.

Aside from Jaime's wedding, I had never been inside the Salt Lake temple. It is incredible to see especially to think of the labor that went into building it- without the help of power tools, cranes, or computerized architectural renderings. It was mind-boggling. I loved being there with my sister.

We wandered through art exhibits at the Church History Museum, as well as the Conference Center. When we first arrived to see the art competition winners on display at the CC, we stayed together, looking at each piece and talking a little about each one. But soon we had split off from each other, meandering and admiring individually.

We barely talked the rest of the time we were there, and didn't admit until later in the day the reason for this. It turns out that both of us were so full of emotion viewing the exhibit, that we were embarrassed to try to talk to each other for fear of bawling uncontrollably. Truly, it was a spiritual experience. I know that the arts are a powerful form of communication that cross all boundaries. Looking at artwork created on the other side of the world, and feeling so deeply a message the artist was sending was a moving experience. We all share joy and pain in this mortal experience, and there is so much beauty to be found all around us. Again, I'm glad I was there with Jaime.

Here is an example called "Windows of Heaven" by Emilie McPhie. And here's the description that hung next to the painting. (Which was so beautiful, by the way-- photos don't do it justice. Can you see what she's doing? Knitting a sweater for her daughter from the yarn of her own sweater.)

"One day I was left alone with my little girl and my baby. As I ventured downstairs to make lunch, I thought about how all-consuming babies are and how my life had been turned upside down. I thought, “Who in their right mind would choose to have a baby, considering the money and time required, lost opportunities, adventures not taken, and ambitions set aside.” Divine intervention was needed for me. I set a sandwich in front of my darling daughter, and she looked up at me through her long lashes with her big blue eyes. It hit me—it took my breath away and brought tears to my eyes. It was as if the windows of heaven opened through her eyes and poured out love and light. Children are a precious gift. It is an honor and privilege to be their custodian for a time. I want to remember this every day. I want to feel this every time children look at me."

Movie Nights

We were borrowing a projector for a workshop I helped put on Saturday, and felt we should definitely create an outdoor theater for the kids! All the neighborhood kids and even some cousins came for one or both showings. It was so much fun; I think we are going to need to purchase a projector...

This post about our trip to Washington contains the picture equivalent of 10,000 words.

I tried to use different photos here than the ones I put up on Facebook. That reminds me... BECCA! GET ON FACEBOOK TODAY! Please. :)